Top Ten Tuesday: The Reluctant Co-sleeper’s Lament

See that cute little butt? Yeah, the boy attached to it owns my bed. And this bed ain’t big enough for three.

But every time I feel inspired to do the hard work required to get him used to sleeping in his own bed, I end up caving. Thus, this week’s Top Ten list of reasons I am totally, utterly conflicted on this whole idea of co-sleeping.

1. I don’t sleep well with a little critter tethered to my boob and/or thrashing about all night long.

2. But I don’t sleep at all with a toddler screaming in the next room. None of us do.

3. I’m not sure the world’s best masseuse could work out the kinks in my neck and shoulders from contorting myself around this baby most every night for the past year.

4. But he’s so precious all cradled up beside me, and this phase of parenting passes so darn fast!

5. The attachment-parenting people say crying it out is mean, and that children who are forced to do it turn out…psychotic or something. (It certainly feels mean while you’re doing it.)

6. Zach and Eli both cried-it-out and were excellent sleepers before they were a year old. They’re still good sleepers. And as far as I can tell, they are psychologically sound. Healthy, even. Sweet and kind. They know they’re loved. It’s all good.

7. But the crying, the heartbreaking, gut-wrenching crying–I have outgrown my ability to endure it!

8. But my current idea of heaven is what I dream of: sleeping alone, spread-out flat in the middle of a nest of pillows, for at least eight hours straight. (Sorry, hubby, you’re not in this particular dream.)

9. Speaking of the hubs, I know he misses the quiet solitude of just us in our bedroom, and wonders if that will ever be again.

10. But we both believe in the benefits of extended breastfeeding with baby-led weaning. Jonah’s too distracted to nurse much during the day. If I cut him off at night, he’ll miss a good bit of the amazing nutrition and immunity only my milk can give him.

I am no closer to my solution after writing this out, but I totally welcome suggestions and input from other mothers!

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2 replies on “Top Ten Tuesday: The Reluctant Co-sleeper’s Lament”

  1. I had one who had to be attached to me all. the. time. It was hard.

    And then she outgrew it. And those days were over. My husband and I got our bed back; she slept through the night on her own.

    She is 11 now and still loves contact and snuggling. But she got over the constant need and is now a delightful young lady. Go with your gut and your heart!

  2. It definitely has its ups and downs, but I'm glad I've co-slept with our 2 kiddos. I suggest having your husband sleep with your son in another room if you really want to end it. I think crying-it-out with Papa is much different from CIO all alone. The Sears book has some good info on this. Pantley too.

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