Bad Mood Blues

I was in a rotten mood earlier tonight, and I feel it trying to creep back on me.

What broke me out of it earlier was some friends sharing some funny jokes on Facebook, and finding a site that shows text messages where Auto Correct went horribly, horribly wrong. SUPER funny stuff — I laughed til I cried! Nothing is quite so good for a crabby woman than some truly aerobic laughter.

Except maybe fine chocolate, a long vacation and a maid. But none of those are even blips on my radar tonight.

But then everyone else went to bed, and I made the mistake of walking by a TV that was left on. I  saw some stupid redneck standing on a boat, shooting at an alligator in the water, yelling something so heavily southern-accented that it couldn’t possibly have been real English, and I don’t know what happened, but that mood came back on me like a fly meeting a windshield on I-20.

I am drowning in testosterone, y’all. I love all the guys in my life. Honestly, I do. But sometimes, it’s all just a bit too much: all the burping, and farting, the constant sounds of racing engines and gunfire whenever the Xbox is on, shows like Top Gear and Ax Men and whatever that stupid thing was that I walked by earlier. The piles of dirty clothing — none of it pink or pretty, but all blue and brown and camouflage interspersed by socks and underwear dirtier than anything I could’ve ever produced.

And don’t even get me started on the damage they do to a bathroom.

I am just tired.

I’m supposed to be writing some articles for pay at the moment, and I can’t do it. I just don’t have what it takes right now. I have my son’s 13th birthday party to prepare for (also known as The 18 Hours I Welcome Four More Males Into Our Midst) and that to-do list is still a mile long. I have to get up early to bake brownies to take to our homeschool group meeting, where I get to chase Jonah (who has been impossible lately — could’ve sworn the Terrible Twos started later than this!) and only hope that I catch a few minutes of good adult conversation with the other moms.

I am so looking forward to ladies night out next week. You just can’t imagine how much!

I just wish we were going somewhere ultra-feminine, somewhere pretty, like the  little romantic tea-room my sister took me to ages ago. I need to be around pretty things, breathe in a fresh dose of perfumed, estrogen-soaked air and touch some flowers and some lace. Just be somewhere beautiful.

I know if I were to be away from my family more than a day or two, I’d miss them terribly, warts and all. But sometimes, a mama just needs a break. And perhaps I’m biased in this opinion, but I think it’s particularly true when she is the only female in the house!